Nature's Atomic Bomb

Mother Nature can be even more destructive than man if she gets mad enough. The unprecedented tsunami event in the Asia-Pacific is proof of that. The death toll will come in close to 100,000 when all is said and done. This is more people dead than the dropping of the atomic bomb in Hiroshima (see reference below). An interesting point here is that reports from Sri Lanka say that other than domesticated animals, there are no animal corpses to be found; no rabbits, no elephants, no wild animals of any kind. They were able to sense the danger and GTF outta the way. Maybe we're not so smart after all, eh?

Reference - "In 1946, the Manhattan Engineer District published a study that concluded that 66,000 people were killed at Hiroshima out of a population of 255,000. Of that number, 45,000 died on the first day and 19,000 during the next four months."
-- warbirdforum.com

Condolences to All Those with Family & Friends Affected by This Tragic Event.
Donations can be sent to Red Cross Here[redcross.org] -- the server may be a little slow, so please wait.


The Great Coping Saw Mystery of '04

The other day I was in a large home improvement store because I needed to buy a coping saw. I was making a wood project--which I hardly ever do--that required lots of cutting of curved lines, and that's what a coping saw is for (in case you weren't sure).

So how often does one actually go to the store looking to buy a coping saw? Maybe once in a lifetime, right? I went to the tool section and looked in the saw area. I saw every kind of saw imaginable: hack saws, hand saws, sheetrock saws, keyhole saws, and tree saws to name a few. There was, however, one hanger that was completely empty...yup, you guessed it, there were no coping saws. The one lousy time I wanted to buy one - it wasn't there.

So, not to be outdone, I went to another large home improvement retailer. I quickly went to the tool aisle and found even more saws...but no coping saw. I cornered the dude that worked there and asked if he had any coping saws stashed away somewhere...
"No, I wish I did," he said. "I've had them on order for three weeks and I have no idea when they'll be here. Everyone keeps asking for them."
First of all I find it odd that so many people are looking for these saws at the same time. Second, is there only one lousy company making these things and they took off for the holidays?

So I was about to give up when I decided to go a little out of my way and hit the small county hardware store about 30 minutes away. I got there just before they closed and the place was a mess from the day's shoppers. I finally found a coping saw buried under some other saws. "Finally!" I exlcaimed. "The last coping saw in 50 miles!"

I got home. It was late. I decided to start my project the next day, so I went into the basement to find a good place to stash the saw. I had a packing box full of tools from my recent move and figured that was a good place for now. I opened the box and there on the top was--yup, you guessed it again--another coping saw!!

I guess maybe once-in-a-lifetime purchase was not the right phrase.


Plant to Make Clean Power from Turkey Droppings

Here's the story from Yahoo/Reuters Plant to Make Clean Power from Turkey Droppings

That gets me thinking...Why can't they make one of these for human droppings? That would combine our sewer treatment and power plant infrastructures.

Also, during times when extra power is needed, like prime A/C time in the summer, they can hire people to 'create' more energy. This would provide a whole new workforce of people that were previsouly useless!

Imagine, row upon row of stalls where scores of couch potatoes could sit in comfort and read the newspaper and do their "duty" for their country! How great is that!


Jeffrey Dahmer's Mexican Cousin

MEXICO CITY (Reuters) - A Mexican man killed his lover in a drunken, drugged fight then cooked the man's body in tomato and onion sauce and ate it over three days. Police found Gumaro de Dios Arias grilling rotting human flesh for his breakfast, including part of a heart, when they raided a shack he lived in near the Caribbean beach resort of Playa del Carmen, a police chief said on Wednesday.

"He was preparing stews. There was a grill where he was cooking part of the heart and bits he had cut off the body. It was terrible, terrible," said local police chief Martin Estrada, who was among a dozen police who raided the shack.

Arias told police the victim, a young man, arrived at his cardboard hut in a wasteland area with a mutual friend who then left the two of them drinking and taking drugs. The pair had sex and afterward a fight broke out during which he killed the man with blows to the head, police said.

Police arrested Arias, 25, on Tuesday after a tip off.
"They said there was a person eating a person," Estrada said.

"We found him lying on a folding bed and to one side was the corpse which had been torn apart and which it seems he had been eating for three days," he told Reuters.

The corpse, which had its back ripped open and its innards pulled out, was missing various parts, like a thigh, he said.


Reality TV + Better Traffic Flow

How about this for a new TV channel: The All-Traffic Incident Network. We'll call it CrashNet. Since people are obviously friggin enamored with looking at road side incidents--even when there is nothing to see people!--we can just televise them all. The idea behind this is that you will be able to satisfy your morbid curiosity 24 hours a day, in the comfort of your own home. The hopeful side effect of all this is that when there is a real altercation on the highway, no one will rubberneck and the traffic will flow better. Think about it - why drive slow and hold up everyone to get a quick one-second glance at the incident, when you can hurry home at 80mph and watch it up close on TV for as long as you want! Just try not to become tonight's main feature yourself. Most cop cars have video cams in them now anyway- we just have to get them hooked up to realtime reporting servers. We can also show 'The Best of' when things are slow. Plus there can be a couple of great weekly or special features such as: Holiday Tradegies, Multi-car Pile-ups, Trucks Gone Wild, and Who Put That on the Road?

I will be accepting offers from networks now. Have a good day.


Available All The Time (in Dog Years)

I'm sure you've heard the phrase '24x7' - A term that started out with telecomm and network carriers is now being used everywhere. For example: Little Timmy Dorfo on his skateboard to his friends, "Dudes, this skate park is awesome! I could flip and grind here 24-7!"

This is all fine with me, but what bothers me is that when people (corporate or otherwise) try and take it to the next level. They want to say they are available every day, all day, all year long, so they say 24x7x365. For example: Big Steve Studly to his new squeeze, "Baby, I'm here for you 24x7x365."

But if you do the math, isn't that seven years? I don't think Big Steve realizes the committment he just made. Is everyone is trying to say they're available all year long even if you're using dog years? Does Fido even care about telecomm, skateboards, or anything other than food and another dog's ass?

SO let's all be more accurate and say either 24x7x52 or 24x365. That's my opinion anyway.


Urban Slang for the UnCool

If you're like me and totally out of it, or are a parent to a teen and want to know what the hell they are saying, etc. Check out the Urban Slang Dictionary where you can find terms like 'bison', 'blindian', and 'Mollywop'. Maybe if you read it enough, you will even turn cool! (but don't hold your surface breath.)


Gifts for the Person with Everything

Sorry it's been a while since I've updated...you know, the holidays and all...

Here's a couple of interesting sites to find items for those people who are hard to shop for:

(1) First at Edible.com you can get interesting snacks for those people who have interesting culinary tastes. Items include: Green Crocodile Curry, Snake Vodka, BBQ Worm Crisps (also Cheddar and Chili flavors), Chocolate Ant Bars, and Giant Hornet Honey. Plus there are a variety of aphrodisiacs available, because who wouldn't want to be with someone who eats worm crisps! The prices are in British pounds, but they ship all over the globe!

(2) Do you have a supervillain, mad scientist, warlord, dictator, or despot in your life? Dont we all? Then head on over to Villain Supply and get those hard to find items for Christmas. Some of the best buys here include: INSTA-FALL TRAP DOOR, BRAIN-EATING" BUG, EXPLODING OBEDIENCE COLLAR, LASER CANNON, KRYOZAP 6000 SUPER FREEZE RAY. Plus a host of superweapons to destroy the Earth and new technology likes the SELF-REPLICATING NANO-VIRUS. You can also purchase superpowers such as ADAMANTIUM STEEL BONES, METAPSYCHIC BIONIC IMPLANT and more (sorry no returns on superpowers). This is THE Online Source For Everything EVIL.