JOKE #1
As a senior citizen was driving down the freeway, his car phone rang.
Answering, he heard his wife's voice urgently warning him, "Herman, I just heard on the news that there's a car going the wrong way on Interstate 280. Please be careful!"
"It's not just one car," said Herman. "It's hundreds of them!"
JOKE #2
An elderly gent was invited to his old friends' home for dinner one evening.
He was impressed by the way his buddy preceded every request to his wife with endearing terms-Honey, My Love, Darling, Sweetheart, Pumpkin, etc.
The couple had been married almost 70 years, and clearly they were still
very much in love. While the wife was in the kitchen, the man leaned over and
said to his host, "I think it's wonderful that, after all these years, you still call your wife those loving pet names."
The old man hung his head. "I have to tell you the truth," he said, "I
forgot her name about 10 years ago.