Do the following:
1. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.
2. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries With That.
3. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label It, "In."
4. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For Three Weeks. Once Everyone Has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch To Espresso.
5. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write "For Sexual Favors."
6. Finish All Your Sentences, With "In Accordance With The Prophecy."
7. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.
8. Ask People What Sex They Are. Laugh Hysterically After They Answer.
9. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go."
10. Sing Along At The Opera.
11. Go To A Poetry Recital And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme.
12. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area And Play Tropical Sounds All Day.
13. Have Your Co-Workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, "Rock Hard."
14. When The Money Comes Out Of The ATM, Scream "I Won! I Won!"
15. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking Lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives, They're Loose!!"
16. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go."