Things that would have been good to know when I was younger include:
- If you think there is good in everybody, you haven't met everybody.
- The probability of someone watching you is proportional to the stupidity of your action.
- Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.
- Where there's a will, there's an attorney.
- Always borrow money from a pessimist. They don't expect to be paid back.
- Your conscience never stops you from doing anything. It just stops you from enjoying it.
- Don't worry about temptation--as you grow older, it starts avoiding you.
- When you're in it up to your ears, keep your mouth shut!
- To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first, and call whatever you hit the target.
- When you're finally holding all the cards, everyone else will decide to play chess.
- The trouble with life is that you're half-way through it before you realize it's a do-it-yourself thing.